Monday, December 15, 2008

It Runs In The Family...

MAL-A-DY [mal-uh-dee] –noun, plural -dies. 1. any disorder or disease of the body, esp. one that is chronic or deepseated.

In case you haven't heard, there is a common disorder that affects the entire human race, but not many people are even aware that it exists. It appears to be handed down from generation to generation...and our family suffers from it pretty severely at times. I'm not quite sure of the proper, scientific term, but it's commonly referred to in our home as, "Hearing Dyslexia."

For some reason, it seems to strike my immediate family more often than not when we're listening to music. Let me give you some of my funnier examples:

Toby Keith's first single was "I Should Have Been a Cowboy." The first verse is referring to my brother Clay's favorite TV show when we were growing up, "Gun Smoke." I personally HATED that show!!! Here's how it goes:

"I bet you've never heard ole Marshall Dillion say
Miss Kitty have you ever thought of running away
Settling down will you marry me
If I asked you twice and begged you pretty please
She'd of said Yes in a New York minute
They never tied the knot
His heart wasn't in it
He stole a kiss as he road away
He never hung his hat up at Kitty's place."


Instead of "Marshall Dillion" I heard..."Barstool Dillion" and heartily sang it that way...probably for months-until Clay corrected me.

Another song was Bryan White's "Rebecca Lynn." The verse I got confused with says,

"High school days,
me and Becky learnin'
What it really means to be in love.
Give and take, holdin' back for heaven's sake
Fightin' for a week, then makin'up."


No lie, "Fightin' for a week, then" sounded to me like..."Fighting for a Wheat Thin, makin' up." It made absoultely NO sense to me, but hey! I didn't write the song...I just sang it...until once again, Clay corrected me. That's what big brothers are for, right?

Go on, you know you want to laugh at that one. My brother Clay did...a lot! My sister just says I'm blonde. :)

Unfortunately, my children have also been afflicted with this malady. Here are a few of their examples:

J (while singing the Christmas Carol, "Ring the Bells" off a very upbeat Kid's Christmas CD), asked me what "Ringle Bells" were. :)

E (while listening to Billy Gillman's "The Snake Song") was singing along with these lyrics...

"He swallered a frog and hollered yum-yum
He slid down the hillside and darted his tongue
He entered the garden on this bright moonlight night
Then he stopped in his tracks, it was love at first sight
(he said) My skin is black, your skin is green
You dwell in a garden, I live by a stream
Although I'm short and stocky and you're long and lean
I've got a crush on you
Then he squeezed her tighter and tighter and tighter"


and asked me what a "todder" was. I told him I had never heard of that word, and asked where he heard it. He then proceeded to sing that part of the song to me (he held her todder), and I lost it! He innocently thought it was part of our anatomy. :)

N, last but certainly not least was singing the song, "I Love Rock & Roll" and instead of, "I love Rock & Roll! Put another dime in the jukebox,Baby!" was singing, "I love Rock & Roll! Put another dime in the shoebox, Baby!"

What can I say? It runs in the family...We're sick.

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